The Story Behind the Story

Why do today’s marriages topple over while yesterday’s make the long haul? No doubt the reasons vary, yet one may be related to technology. We have certainly entered into an age when it is more cost effective to dispose of products rather than repair them. Consumers can’t keep up with the technical advancements, and what is cutting edge today is dumped tomorrow. Things are not “built to last,” but built to taste and feel like bread, even office buildings now have a shelf life. If, then, the younger generation is taught to trash dated products, wouldn’t they do the same with people? Besides, if you can recycle a marriage and try again—that’s all the better.

It’s evident the “thick and thin” marriages are being replaced with the “crash and burn.” Although celibate, I hear enough stories behind the screen or in the friary parlor that I could moonlight as a soap opera scriptwriter. Priests know “the story behind the story,” and why wedding pictures find themselves off the wall and into the garbage. The crisis within the ranks of the clergy can’t compare with the adultery, pornography, and abuse of every kind which plagues married couples. Simply put, the big reason why one walks out the front door is because sin quietly slithered in by the back.

Since my certitude is greater than my fear of offending even one reader, I must say the reason why many marriages fail is more spiritual than social. Instead of building a solid life together on the granite of godly principles, many have only packing peanuts to work with, like emotional attachment and good will. I am no prophet, but neither am I an idiot; a marriage built on “me” instead of “thee” must, in time, collapse.

—Fr. Glenn Sudano, CFR, From the Friars, January 24, 2007